penismightier.com

So apparently the PG-13 rating is 20 years old. And we have Gremlins and Indiana Jones to blame:

After “Temple of Doom” opened May 23, [1984], some parents complained to theater managers and the ratings board that their kids were mortified [about the ripping-the-still-beating-heart-out-of-the-poor-sap's-chest scene]…

The debate might have faded there if not for “Gremlins,” which came out two weeks later. …

“So the idea of taking a 4-year-old to see ‘Gremlins,’ thinking it’s going to be a cuddly, funny animal movie and then seeing that it turns into a horror picture, I think people were upset,” Dante told the AP. “They felt like they had been sold something family friendly and it wasn’t entirely family friendly.”

What a bunch of bullshit! Gremlins is Class-A Family Fun. I remember watching it with my family, and we’d all cheer when the old bitch had her electric chair short-circuited so it flew up the stairs and launched her out the window, to die a most uncouth death upside-down in the snow. Served the bitch right!! And then that Gremlin that died in the blender, his little legs still spinning around…so cute. Oh oh oh and then when that one Gremlin was dressed like a doctor and was carrying a scalpel right before they blew up the movie theatre to mass murder them all…Geez, I just don’t get some people’s definition of “family movie,” I guess.

And Indy, I mean…if you’re going to have a problem with live-action heart removal but not the splitting-a-steamed-snake-open-to-eat-its-still-living-babies scene, well, I think the problem’s with you and not the rating.