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I was talking to my grandfather today and he told me about how his day went. He had gone to visit a cousin of mine that has 2 kids, a 3 year old and a 1 year old. The three year old, a boy, apparently ran out of the bathroom extremely proud of going by himself without help. In fact, he related this story to the entire household by saying “I just went potty by myself, and I had a boner.” I guess his mother and father just broke out laughing, and the rest of the people there were appalled.

My grandfather then went into how he lectured the kids parents, all the while complaining about how they couldn’t stop laughing long enough to take him seriously. As I’m hearing this, and I dont know wether to laugh my ass off about the kids announcement or laugh my ass off because his father is apparently teaching him entirely the wrong language. Either way, my grandfather starts to get a little upset that I cant stop laughing either. In between chuckles all I can manage to say is “Thats just not right, man.”

Of course, this story was brought up later in a mixed setting (no grandparents) and someone pipes up with “A boner? Is that even physically possible?” The discussion turns into a chorus of ‘yes’ and ‘no’ with no one believing one another. Then, to make matters worse I pipe in with “Until I was 8 I thought it just meant I had to use the bathroom really badly”.

Once again, I’m the one that went over the line.