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What kind of name is Diddy Kong anyway?

September 28th, 2006 by Clme · No Comments

Occasionally I fall victim to temptation and I allow myself to become absorbed in a game. Unfortunately, with my addictive personality that tends to result in many, many hours lost that could have otherwise been used for much more useful tasks such as masturbation, torturing small animals, or some combination of the two. As with any addiction, this one is not without side effects. One of the side effects is that my dreams start to incorporate the game into them in some fashion. You can imagine what kind of dreams I get after spending hours playing Battlefield 1942 or any form of Grand Theft Auto. But thats nothing compared to the types of dreams I have after playing MarioKart… Its embarassing, because I start to talk in my sleep and wake up humming the theme music. I have several times been shaken awake and told that I was yelling out “Fucking princesses!” and wildly moving my thumbs. Even now, as I close my eyes all I can picture is green turtle shells. About the only thing I find more embarassing is answering the phone while I’m having a dream about a text adventure or old BBS game. Somehow I can actually dream the text scrolling across and still become absorbed in the dream thinking I’ve discovered some new area I had previously missed. Then suddenly, the phone will ring and I’ll groggily roll over and answer it. “Hello?” I’ll say. “Hi, is this Clem?” the caller will say. “How did you get to this sector? I swear I lost you at the starport!” It only goes downhill from there, since sometimes I will get angry that they’re not understanding what I’m talking about accuse them of not being able to read. Girlfriends do not like that. Neither do bosses. It does scare away telemarketers pretty well though.

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