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While watching television this evening I kept seeing ads for “My Bloody Valentine… in 3D!”

It definitely looks interesting. Half naked women running around while being chased by a guy with an axe. Sounds like either a great date movie or a late night Cinemax fapfest. The fact its in 3d adds something… as long as there are 3d boobies floating around. No boobies? Well, maybe its at least scary.

That brings up an interesting question… what about 3d porn? I mean, I know someone has to have done it before, but the thought of 3d boobies coming out of a huge movie screen still intrigues me. Why cant I find anything like this online? All I get when I do searches are super creepy incest comics with ’3d art’.

But then I started to think about it more in depth. Sure, 3d boobies are great, but what about 3d cacks? The entire audience ducking because they are afraid that they may suffer concussion by 20 foot long schlong?

Or perhaps a particular nasty anal scene? Suddenly there would be a closeup of a gaping asshole and the audience would all feel like they were falling into the Sarlacc pit.

But thats a risk I’m willing to take. Give me a helmet and a grappling hook, I’m going in.