Comfortable With Conformity

So, New Year's. Except for a horrible fight with S at around 2 am, last night couldn't have gone any better. No, I take that back-- it could have been warmer. I had thrown on a ridiculously heavy winter coat over my little black dress before leaving the house, hoping my pantyhosed legs would survive the trip from the door to the car.

I won't go heavy into the party's details (the party was at j's apt.), but it was great fun. We had silly games, noise makers, Mystikal on the stereo, and good cookies and pizza rolls. S showed up late and received a dare to do a strip tease dance in front of me.

Our fight began in the Starlight Diner, and, as always, continued on the drive home, finally ending in my driveway. These kind of intense, reason-heavy arguments give me the worst headaches, and I finally went to bed a little after 4 am, only waking up this morning because I had to go to work.

Driving home from work this afternoon, I was feeling wonderful. I had called S to make nice, the air was still cold but not freezing, there was still some sunlight left in the day, and I was planning to go home, make a late lunch and work out. When I came home, my mom was very upset-- she's been having bad headaches and had a dizzy spell this morning when she went for a walk. Years ago, she said, when that happened, her eyesight got worse and she was told she had high blood pressure. Now she's worried her eyesight is deteriorating even more. While I can't blame her for being worried...the crying gets to me. She's convinced it wasn't just a dizzy spell, that her blood pressure is going up again, and that her eyes are getting worse. When I asked her what was wrong, she started choking up the second she spoke. To most of you reading this, I sound un-feeling, but you don't live with my mom. Like I said in another entry, my mom has teared up when I called her Weight Watchers meetings stupid. And now, I'm sick with worry about my mom worrying.

So much for being in a wonderful mood.

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