posted 04-22-2001 03:44            

We can't deal with the fact that they aren't as painfully primitive as us. Most of us could go on diet of sex, beer, pretzels, and sleep and be perfectly content with life.

Chicks cannot.

Believe me though, I'm not saying all guys are primitive apes. I'm not. Bet, most of you guys aren't... well... ummm... anyways.

Chicks confuse us, cuz they're chicks... it's plain, it's simple.

posted 04-22-2001 04:58           

Girls are just...girls. There is no logic behind it, just marketing...heh.

posted 04-22-2001 08:28            

Hehe. Actually I think you can, but there are a very specific set of rules that must be followed before you attempt it:

1) They must shoot first
2) Their shot actually has to hit you.
3) You must be wearing "blaze orange" (or is that deer... I forget.)
4) You must be using a .22 (or smaller)
5) If you do shoot them, make sure its a kill. An injury just makes them mad.

If you see a woman with a gun...Run. For some reason (at least in Wisconsin) the women have a hell of a lot better aim then the men. Grandma always "missed" those racoons and possums that were merely 20 feet away... but she could take out a rabbit eating her petunias at 100 yards... I never could figure out that woman

-Chris

posted 04-22-2001 08:48            

rev^kev - Marketing, yes, you need women to sell almost everything.

skeeter - We blow up the sun, plain and simple.

posted 04-22-2001 11:27            

But you make it sound like men are such simple creatures. Yeah, you're so simple you can't communicate a damn thing so we sit here wondering what the hell you're thinking. We communicate conflicting signals and emotions, but at least we're telling you what's going on inside our minds at a given moment.

Unless we say "nevermind". In which case, you should run.

But really zippy, what set this off?

posted 04-22-2001 12:56            

1. Men are FAR more likely to communicate their desires than women are. Failing to tell you whether or not those jeans make you "look fat" is a matter of SURVIVAL SKILLS, not "lack of communication skills".

2. You fuckers ALWAYS say "nevermind."

3. Women SAY they want somebody to understand them - but they don't really mean it. Women want someone to understand what they WANT them to understand - and no fucking more. (Never, EVER commit the crime of knowing what a woman is thinking when she wasn't expecting you to.)

I will also note that the very women GUILTIEST of all the above traits are the first and the loudest to protest "but I'm not like that!" ... which is not to say that if you protest you're lying, but it IS to say that protesting and pressing a man to instantly confirm his unswerving belief that your protest was valid is, err... less than productive.

posted 04-22-2001 12:58            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Bex:
But really zippy, what set this off?

---

::blinks::

::looks around::

How'd zippy get dragged into this, anyway?

posted 04-22-2001 13:44            

Read the main page. Namely zippy screaming due to some estrogen-induced angst that he did not detail.

Well, hrm. How to respond..

1) Men do NOT communicate very well, in general. I'm talking about the emotional stuff chicks crave. Yeah you can talk about cars and overclocking and tamarind, and even the size of your penii, but not about how your lady love gets you all misty-eyed when she eats a banana. It's the little things you just don't talk about. And when you're upset, you lock it all up inside and we never know what the hell has you pissed off, other than we're taking the brunt of it. We ask what's wrong, and get either no response or yelled at.

2)Nevermind means we're really pissed and we know it's going to start a screaming fight if we tell you and dammit if you had any sense, you'd know what you did to get us this angry anyway. Ignorant irritating bastard, you.

And yes, on the surface, 1 and 2 seem startlingly alike. But they're not. Not at all. Mostly because we only say nevermind when we're mad at YOU. Guys will lock up because they had a bad day at work, someone flipped them off on the highway, they're hungry, they're tired, they're naturally dysfunctional, etc.

posted 04-22-2001 14:24            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Bex:
It's the little things you just don't talk about. And when you're upset, you lock it all up inside and we never know what the hell has you pissed off...

---

Damn right Bex!

posted 04-22-2001 14:42         

quote:

---

Originally posted by Bex:
1) Men do NOT communicate very well, in general. I'm talking about the emotional stuff chicks crave.
...
It's the little things you just don't talk about.

---

there are a small number of thoughts sludging about in the average guy's head. like food, sex, booze, and so on. other things are transitory and talking about them just prolongs the time we waste before we get back to the things that really mean something to us. like boobs and fire. chicks may like emotional things, but men have little desire to analyze how each event from our day has impacted our emotional state and that little bit that some are born with is gradually subdued by frequent beatings from childhood peers.

quote:

---

dammit if you had any sense, you'd know what you did to get us this angry anyway. Ignorant irritating bastard, you.

---

posted 04-22-2001 16:08            

i'm not so confused anymore. it's amazing what being semi-lucid at 3 a.m will do for your level of clarity.

as for the communication differences between men and women, i think my ape creature from black&white said it best: "arghuuha? *scratching head* archhaghuugha"

posted 04-22-2001 17:15         

quote:

---

Originally posted by Bex:

1) Men do NOT communicate very well, in general. I'm talking about the emotional stuff chicks crave. Yeah you can talk about cars and overclocking and tamarind, and even the size of your penii, but not about how your lady love gets you all misty-eyed when she eats a banana. It's the little things you just don't talk about. And when you're upset, you lock it all up inside and we never know what the hell has you pissed off, other than we're taking the brunt of it. We ask what's wrong, and get either no response or yelled at.

---

This basically describes the exact relationship between my ex-girlfriend and I. Except EXACTLY the other way around. Which is eventually why I left her.

posted 04-22-2001 17:54            

Now, I personally try to communicate when I have something to say. If an action has been taken and I have gotten pissed about it to the point of saying "nevermind", it is usually because said action has been taken previously, a fight or two has ensued, and the offending party REALLY should have known better. I have found that boys are not very good at taking the hint and NEVER EVER doing something again. They nod and agree and do it again anyway.

Regarding male communication.. my last dipshit of a lameass boyfriend had no idea how to communicate. We went out a while, broke up, got back together and he got progressively more and more distant, stood me up frequently and refused to answer me when I asked him what was going on. Refused repeatedly. I was pissed, told him so and asked him what he was thinking. No response.

Finally, one day I found out he had made plans for New Years that did not include me. So I asked him what the FUCK he thought he was doing. Told him the relationship was bullshit and I had had enough. Then he meekly tells me when he got back together with me, he thought he would be able to fall in love with me again, but it hadn't worked out. How's that for a kick in the ass? Something like two months where he really wished I would just get up and leave and he couldn't say anything.

Guys, if you want to break up, break up. Do not turn into a stupid irritating fuck in hopes she will dump you. I wasted way too much type trying to analyze that cretin because he wouldn't talk to me. Grr.

(and the above story is why I went off so much on guys previously. )

posted 04-22-2001 22:05            

quote:

---

If an action has been taken and I have gotten pissed about it to the point of saying "nevermind", it is usually because said action has been taken previously, a fight or two has ensued, and the offending party REALLY should have known better. I have found that boys are not very good at taking the hint and NEVER EVER doing something again. They nod and agree and do it again anyway.

---

I told you I was sorry! Bex? Can you open the door? Bex? Um... Er... Can I have a pillow or something? I'm getting tired.

*CRASH*

Ouch. What was that for?

-Chris

posted 04-22-2001 22:21            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Bex:
1) ... when you're upset, you lock it all up inside and we never know what the hell has you pissed off, other than we're taking the brunt of it. We ask what's wrong, and get either no response or yelled at.

2)Nevermind means we're really pissed and we know it's going to start a screaming fight if we tell you and dammit if you had any sense, you'd know what you did to get us this angry anyway. Ignorant irritating bastard, you.

And yes, on the surface, 1 and 2 seem startlingly alike.

---

Glad we have you to point these things out for us, Bex.

Typical male desire/action patterns:
want beer/soda, don't want to get out from under car: "Hey babe, can you bring me a beer?"
had shitty day, want hug: "What a crap-lousy day. C'mere, you."
had shitty day, want space: "What a fucking day. Um, I'm gonna go play games / watch TV / whatever for a while - I gotta unwind."

Typical female desire/action patterns:
want beer/soda, doesn't want to stop what she's doing: :: quietly goes and gets it, resents man for not bringing it ::
had shitty day, wants hug: :: picks fight with man, resents him for avoiding confrontation instead of realizing what she really wants is a hug ::
had shitty day, wants space: :: picks fight with man, resents him for trying to hug her instead of just backing the hell off ::

posted 04-23-2001 10:46            

I daresay I must quibble.

Typical male desire/action patterns:
want beer/soda, don't want to get out from under car: "Hey babe, can you bring me a beer?"
had shitty day, want hug: Complain incessantly about whatever went wrong, repeat when you think I'm not listening, get me pissed off too and then wonder why we're fighting instead of hugging.
had shitty day, want space: "What a fucking day. Um, I'm gonna go play games / watch TV /
whatever for a while - I gotta unwind."

Typical female desire/action patterns:
want beer/soda, doesn't want to stop what she's doing: :: I bribe my guy with smooches, which he looks at as bribes instead of as perfectly nice smooches.
had shitty day, wants hug: :: Tries to get hug, distracts guy from whatever he is doing (ie: online), gets a halfassed response or is told to wait a sec while he spends another 15 minutes online, a fight ensues because proper attention is not forthcoming, and then too pissed off to accept the desired hug.
had shitty day, wants space: :: go in room, lay down with dog, mope and act unresponsive when questioned. Fight ensues when guy won't leave.

You know, the more I think about this, the more I wonder how only 10 percent of the population is gay. You'd think it would be the other way around. Hard to believe the addition of a little testosterone to the mix can make such a completely different personality.