posted 08-20-2001 01:14            

What in the fuck goes on in the female brain? Why do they insist on using one unique situation as a template for the rest of the entire relationship? Why are there anger control classes for men, but no emotional control classes for women, especially when it would do so much good for our anger problem in the first place? What makes them take one sentence out of an entire conversation, twist it around out of context into something ugly and make us suffer until we can figure out how the whole thing started and get everyone back on the same page?

How does: It's rare I see you as happy and relaxed any other time (as when we are fooling around)(long story).

Become: Why do you stick around if I'm only enjoyable when we're intimate?

posted 08-20-2001 05:28            

Women like to see how far they can push a man. The "template" was a traumatic and/or painful part of their past. I no longer trust men because I am afraid they will lie to me, steal from me and leave me. This was a painful part of my own past. I was stupid enough to let this get to me and I tried to suicide. Luckily, I kicked myself in the ass and got out of that particular rut, but I haven't kicked myself hard enough to trust men again.

Now, as for staying with you just for intimacy... well, let's ponder this. Nowadays, NO ONE knows how to talk anymore. Some think that being with someone they don't get along with is better than being alone... true? Does a woman say how she feels? HELL NO! Why? Several reasons. She may not want to "hurt" you, not realizing or even caring that other things she says/does hurts just as much or worse.
Why are we so emotional? Chemicals in the brain that differ from men's.

There are indeed classes for women, they are just rare. Here at the clinic I work at, there are also anger management for women... go figure. (there ARE women who abuse the husbands, boyfriends, or girlfriends.)

(I keep losing my train of thought because I keep getting interrupted... I'll come back to this later.)

posted 08-20-2001 06:29            

quote:

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Originally posted by LonMabonJovi:
What makes them take one sentence out of an entire conversation, twist it around out of context into something ugly and make us suffer until we can figure out how the whole thing started and get everyone back on the same page?

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It's called "changing the subject" - one part of the three tenets of female arguing. At any point in the argument when the female is blatantly at fault or wrong the following will happen (in order):

1. Shift the blame to the other partner

2. Change the subject

3. Start crying

None of which solve the problem, but all of which prevent the woman from ever having to admit that she's anything less than perfect.

posted 08-20-2001 09:01         

Yea, disagreements between men and women are tough. If anyone has a sure fire solution it would have been published and distributed by now. What works best for me is to TRY to keep my mouth shut until the emotion phase passes, then at least I have a SHOT at being understood. The bottom-line for my wife and I is that most arguments are rooted in perception and expectations.

It should be noted that during the dating days I was much more prone to stop and consider what her perceptions might be. I can’t say that I spend much time doing that these days. Sometimes I think that I KNOW her perceptions which is probably way wrong.

-Marcel

posted 08-20-2001 09:20            

I have been very lucky to meet my old GF from high school, we have been able to talk about things that would have made me shiver with the ex GF. So much for your blanket statement (neener neener)

posted 08-20-2001 09:46            

And that philosophy has served me well in the relatioships I have been in. You wanna plays games and be competitive, then break out a deck of cards or Trivial Pursuit.

posted 08-20-2001 10:51            

You will never "reach an agreement" in an argument with your girlfriend/wife/whatever because the moment she "is forced to confront the fact that her way of living is even somewhat flawed" she will want out of the relationship.

posted 08-20-2001 11:42            

quote:

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Originally posted by Chess Piece Face:
You will never "reach an agreement" in an argument with your girlfriend/wife/whatever because the moment she "is forced to confront the fact that her way of living is even somewhat flawed" she will want out of the relationship.

Women cannot be changed. Either accept them exactly as they are (and change yourself accordingly) or start looking for a new one.

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Holy shit... that sums it up in a nutshell. CPF is either a woman, or THE ONLY MAN EVER to figure out the complexities of woman.

BTW, I am not scaring away men (um...), I am just not dating period. Not looking. This will probably mean that I meet the fantabulous guy in one of my classes starting next week, eh? Still, I'd like to wait until I am further in college and have my own car/truck.

posted 08-20-2001 15:01            

quote:

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Originally posted by Amazon:
Holy shit... that sums it up in a nutshell. CPF is either a woman, or THE ONLY MAN EVER to figure out the complexities of woman.

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Except he forgot to mention "first, find one of the incredibly rare women who won't simply change again once she realizes you're adapting, just to throw you right the fuck off again."

posted 08-20-2001 18:55            

quote:

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Originally posted by Jimbo:
Except he forgot to mention "first, find one of the incredibly rare women who won't simply change again once she realizes you're adapting, just to throw you right the fuck off again."

women != stable

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Entropy always increases.

-3

posted 08-21-2001 01:43            

I hate girls that can't tell me how they feel... That's why Jessica was cool. She told me straight out, "Matt, you scare me." Yes, it fucking crushed me and gave me an I-am-less-than-dirt-and-don't-deserve-happiness mentality.. but it was the truth, so I don't feel hostility towards her.

posted 08-21-2001 03:10            

Except quote =~ /Matt/Chris/tr

posted 08-21-2001 11:09            

You can't be honest, because there's BOUND to be some girl somewhere with prettier breasts. Girls know this, so they keep asking the same question until you finally tell the cold hard truth: Yes, I love your breasts and think they're pretty and sexy and fun to play with. But yes, (...insert name here...) has prettier breasts.

And off she goes, leaving me sitting on the bed wondering how I managed to screw it up for the third time.

posted 08-21-2001 12:08            

quote:

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Originally posted by FaRaN:
I'm sure Amazon would date me though.

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Maybe, but I have peculiar tastes. You must be 6ft or taller, you must be slightly overweight, you must be hairy (chest, back, legs AND face), you must not mind a woman who's sexually aggressive and open to new ideas.

Still want to date me?

posted 08-21-2001 12:32            

quote:

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You must be 6ft or taller, you must be slightly overweight, you must be hairy (chest, back, legs AND face), you must not mind a woman who's sexually aggressive and open to new ideas.

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{Pausing in the middle of a full-body shave to admire own rippling biceps and pecs in the mirror}

Two ouf of four won't cut it?

posted 08-21-2001 14:38            

quote:

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You must be 6ft or taller, you must be slightly overweight, you must be hairy (chest, back, legs AND face), you must not mind a woman who's sexually aggressive and open to new ideas.[/B]

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Holy crap! I have never heard myself more aptly described. That is frightening.

Unfortunately, for both of us possibly, I already have a GF and I do not live in Florida.